Daytime Television Debris

Recently, I spent almost a week at home with bronchitis, and along with stints of checking email and obsessing about the work projects I wasn’t getting done, I had the occasion to tune in to daytime television.  Now, I’ll admit that I can be up for a good soap marathon with the best of the couch potatoes, especially when I’m sick.

However, during my recent bronchitis soap marathon, somewhere between meeting Victor’s long lost son, watching Katie grieve for her brother who committed suicide so he could be her heart donor (it’s a soap, people!), rolling my eyes at Jack and Carly’s argument because we all know they really love each other, and conniving with Lizzie to keep Bill from taking over Spaulding Enterprises… I started surfing channels.  Channel surfing always yields some interesting moments when paired with being tired, bored and on meds.  I found that in those circumstances, you’ll pay attention to almost anything which obviously leads to lots of thought debris – those random observations that really have nowhere else to go.  So, here they are on EyeJunkie!

1.   I saw a woman talking about asthma medication who was actually Dr. Gina, the vet on Sesame Street.  Many of you may not be familiar with Sesame Street characters, but I live with a 3-year-old and an 18-month-old.  We know our Elmo!  I said she was actually Dr. Gina because you just don’t think people who live and work on Sesame Street can possibly be anywhere else.  I realize that she probably does have a “real” name, and she probably does other “jobs.”  But, in my house, she will forever be known as the brave soul who took Curly Bear to put her “woo woo” in the potty for the first time.

2.  I noticed that at any given moment from say 8:00am to 6:00pm (and probably beyond), you can find an episode of one of the “CSI” or “Law and Order” franchises somewhere in your channel options.  I find it interesting that these particular shows get so many time slots.  They tend to showcase some of the most bizarre, violent or gut-wrenching fictional crimes on television and depict them in some of the goriest ways.  Yet, it seems from the sheer volume of their air play that Americans can’t live without them.  I know these shows are award-winning, and I’ve seen my share of episodes.  However, I have to admit that now I click the remote arrow right past them every chance I get.  I may be a wimp, but I’ve noticed in my own mind, that the more I fill it with violence as entertainment, the easier it is to give in to daily fears about the world around us.

3.  Seeing college football games on television on Tuesday at 2:00pm in May is very odd — as is watching a random Super Bowl.  I’m not sure I understand the appeal of replaying previous sporting events in the off-season.

4.  Wow!  There are a lot of pretend courtroom shows out there.  Are those judges real judges?  And, what jurisdiction do they have to determine how much restitution Ashley’s ex-boyfriend owes since he left her holding the bag on the past-due rent and payment on the car they shared?  What if one party doesn’t like the ruling?  Is there some sort of tv appeal process?  And, why do they always get called by Judge “insert first name here?”  Odd.

5.  The McDonald’s ads seem to have more and more of a global / abandoned warehouse look.  Also, the one I saw the most included the introduction of the breakfast chicken sandwich as one of society’s greatest accomplishments.

6.  Speaking of ads, I saw one for a Mississippi casino resort that left me wondering how even an ad guy could generate the concept with a straight face.  The Silver Star casino has declared that I’m a star!  And, stars don’t have to worry about this or that reality of life, especially not the daily grind of paying bills and taking care of my family.  Since I’m the star, they encouraged me to just forget those worries and come on down to the slots and drop my money in there.  Considering the economic condition of Mississippi and many families in the counties in which most of our casinos are operated, this concept is not only laughable, it’s downright irresponsible.

7.  I noticed that E! is heavily promoting two new upcoming reality shows:  Denise Richards It’s Complicated and Living Lohan (featuring Deena Lohan, mother of Lindsay Lohan.)  I guess it wasn’t enough that we’ve been subjected to a front row seat in divorce and child custody proceedings, alcohol rehabilitation, mother of the year debates, career evaluations and general name-calling regarding these two women over the past year.  Now, they have chosen to further put their life situations on display in “reality” (insert “edited to achieve maximum shock value and therefore, highest ratings and advertising dollars) television.  Can’t wait.

8.  I know ESPN is available 24/7, but I’m still confused about exactly where we are in the NBA Playoffs — the road to the road to the road to the championship?  I mean, by the time we actually get to the final game of the final series, it’s just an endurance contest to see who can make it down the court without collapsing.  Can’t we simplify this process a little?